


Strange Voices

by romymars (purple_pyro)



Series: Making Monsters [1]
Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Gen, abuse tw, bloodletting rituals, suicide ideation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-28
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-27 07:41:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7609573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purple_pyro/pseuds/romymars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“I’m so glad you could all be here today. As a show of gratitude to all of you, our most generous investors and partners, we at Yodogiri Shining Company wanted to give you a personal showing of our most successful product!"</i>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Monsters are not born, they are created. </p><p>tw: abuse, blood, suicide ideology</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strange Voices

**Author's Note:**

> Character introspection I wrote while I was sick. Sort of an experiment with my regular writing style. I actually feel quite terrible about having written this so no need to guilt trip me any further on it haha

Ruri woke to strange voices.

She was laying on her back, positioned neatly on a table with her arms to her sides and palms up. She blinked dazedly, eyelashes brushing against a hazy blindfold. She could see blurry shapes and a soft light though it, with eight figures circled around her. Ruri's head felt light but her limbs were heavy, and when she tried to lift a hand to her face, she realized in horror that she was paralyzed. All the while, there were whispers.

“Ah, she’s conscious. Gentlemen, a few words before we begin, if I may!” This was the first voice Ruri recognized. Yodogiri Jinnai, the president of her talent agency. An elderly man with a playful tone and a grotesque face. “I’m so glad you could all be here today. As a show of gratitude to you, our most generous investors and partners, we at Yodogiri Shining Company wanted to give you a personal showing of our most successful product!"

A hushed clamor. "She truly is wonderful-” “I understand why-” “-such unnatural beauty-” “-so mysterious-” “mere presence is-” “find such a being-” “It really is true? This girl?"

There was sort of amused chuckle. "Go ahead and see for yourself. Please enjoy yourselves to the fullest, within reason of course, heh heh.”

Someone approached from the periphery, and the figures selected something from the platter the stranger carried. A pause, then all attention was back on Ruri. One person moved closer, and she flinched as something sharp cut the inside of her wrist. A thin dribble of blood ran off her forearm, _stopped,_ and reversed course as if having changed its mind. It retreated back into the small wound without a trace, closed itself up, and disappeared.

“It’s incredi-” “never would’ve believed-” “astounding-” “Yodogiri-san, how-” “a miracle-”

She could hear the sickeningly pleasant smile in Yodogiri's voice. “Please, gentlemen. All can be explained. I did not lie when I said that our dearest Ruri-chan is not quite human!”

 

 

 

_…What…?_

 

“The invitation was delivered in full seriousness. Now, I welcome you all to drink to your satisfaction, and please, continue to support Yodogiri Shining Company in the years to come!"

More murmurs, though Ruri could only re-run the sentence in her head. _Our dearest Ruri-chan is not quite human!_ What could he mean by-

Another cut, deeper and quicker, all the way from her shoulder to her wrist. Despite the reflex to tear her arm away, to hold it to her chest and yell, Ruri was horrified when she couldn't do any of the three. No bindings or ropes held her down, but her whole body was stuck to the table as if magnetized.

 

 

 

_What did they drug me with? And this isn’t the dress I was wearing earlier-_

 

Something hard but cool pushed at the tail end of her wound, running up along the line of split skin before it could knit itself back together. Ruri saw it was a wine glass when a man held it aloft, admiring the small pool of blood at the bottom that he had scooped from the crook of her elbow. He then brought it to his lips.

Another rush of whispers, then "Tsumichi-san! …How is it?"

”…Extraordinary. I can almost believe- no, it must be true. This really could make us immortal.“

 

 

 

_What!? No! That’s not-, I couldn’t-"_

"I’m next!” “No, I should-” “Hey, let me-"

"Gentlemen, there is no rush. Take all the time you desire. And no need to wait in line either," Yodogiri says prettily.

"Really?” “Are you sure-” “You would let-” “-you so much, Yodogi-" ”-so generous!“

The conversation sounded like a grandparent allowing some children a second serving of dessert, and the figures were just as greedy. Their scalpels dug in as if to cleave her apart, smooth glasses pushing into the wounds and grinding against her skin. Ruri couldn’t scream, but she could still cry, and the blindfold soaked up her tears as the figures carve at her body.

 

 

_Why!?_

_Why_

_Why Why Why-_

  
  
_They’re drinking it. Oh god._

_I’m going to throw up._

_I’m going to faint._

_I’m going to die._

_I’m-_

_I-_

_no_

  
_don't_

_help_

_please_

_wait_

_stop_

_why_

_no                                                                                                                                                                                                    help_

_I'm_

_stop_

_why                                                                                             can't_

  


_don’t_

  
_please_

_no_

  


_help_

_I'm_

_I -_

  
_I want-_

_I -_

  
_I want to-_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
                                                                                                               What **do** I want?

 

 

 

_I want to go home_

_I want to leave_

_I want to throw up_

_I want to die_

 

 

_I want_

_  
I want_

_  
I…_

_I…_

 

 

_  
I…_

 

_I want..._

  
  
_I want to break their hands so they stop touching me._

_I want to rip out their eyes so they stop looking at me._

_I want to tear out their tongues so they stop talking._

_I want to rip the smiles off their faces so they stop laughing._

_I want them to bleed the way I have. The way they are making me bleed. Twice as much._

_No, more than that._

_  
I want a price for what they're doing to me. I want their screams to try to be as loud as mine. I want to-_

  
  
_I want-_

_I…_  
  
  
  


  
  


_I..._

_I..._

  
  
_I want to be a monster._

_Finally._  


_The way I’ve dreamed since I was young._

_****_**AND THEN I CAN DIE.**                                          

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
She doesn’t die, but she does lose consciousness. And despite her healing powers, there are wounds that will neither fade nor be forgotten. 

 

She decides to kill them, and then kill herself. For better or worse, she only gets through step one.


End file.
